Feedback Anxiety

I know I know , I just need to have confidence in my abilitites. If I feel good about what I'm making and someone decides to buy it by looking at the pictures and description then what do I have to worry about? I DON"T KNOW! I worry though. I hope over time as I get more feedback that I will be less anxious. I have very few sells and if I was to get even 1 negative feedback against me I think it would ruin my business on Etsy. I know I will make beads no matter if my mother is the only person that wants them but I still need want recognition from fellow beaders .
Why is this coming up ? Well, I'm waiting on some feedback from a few buyers and everyday and every time I sit in front of the computer I have to check for feedback. I hate waiting. I would rather be in my studio aka the garage but as of late, turning on the kiln in 90 degree weather only turns my garage into a furnace. So I wait. Cooler weather, time alone, guilt to subside, ( yes guilt I'm a mom/wife and when I want to be alone I sometimes have to get past the guilt)
So on my wish list for my studio this year would be an air conditioner and heat in the winter. This is a very expensive habit.

Hello?!.....hello......hello......hello

So I'm finally back in my studio! Yippee! Whoo! hoo! It really does feel good. Not so much physically though. I need to figure out a better working position. My neck tends to get sore on the left, hmmmm. Anyway, I've been working on making bead sets and I am happy to say I've reached a marking point in my abilities. I can finally make duplicates! OH! I also made a cute little frog today, which I really had no interest in doing until recent. Its much harder then it looks. Fish are much easier. At least the goofy ones I make. They all have pouty red lips. I just thought of something, putting hair on my fish! ha! I'll try it tomorrow.
I finally put some beads and jewelry pieces on Etsy. Different from what I had up before- we'll see how they do. I love them and hopefully someone else will too.

A process, a pattern or how I operate in stages

I don't know how to balance my time - I find that I'm holed up in my garage, focused on making beads for a good part of my day- but at the same time I don't feel like I get enough time where I'm actually sitting and making beads. I also can't sit longer then a couple of hours, which is probably a healthy habit but I do envy those that sit for 6-8 hrs at a time- does that include bathroom breaks? Lunch?
(This is after I get the kids off to school) Usually I start my morning ritual with taking out yesterdays beads from the kiln and soaking those. Then starts the process of turning on the concentrator, starting the kiln again, turning on the propane and setting the pressure and then back into the house for coffee and breakfast. By this time it's 10am and I start to feel a twinge of panic; I only have a few more hours before the kids are home from school. If there is anything else going on that day, grocery shopping, appointments, school functions, meeting friend, the gym, which there is always something, then that takes away from my torch time. I find myself repeating "its ok, there is always tomorrow" I try to remind myself it isn't just what I did today but the accumulation of my efforts that will give the true picture.

Let me start this by saying...

Yes! I am a beginner lampworker. I've sold a few beads. I even have a little online shop that has been ignored lately by me and buyers. I'm hoping its just because I haven't been listing beads in a long while. hmmm.... time to relist? mark down?
!! So today I got a copy of Passing The Flame By Corina Tettinger!! Finally !! I've been wanting this book for a few years now but I kept spending all my money on glass.... anyway I immediately begin reading it as fast as I could - (I even started from the beginning) but as I'm going through the techniques I soon realize that alot of what is gone over (not all of it) I figured out on my own or picked up from forums. I have to say Corina has a wicked sense of humor, her style and technique is impeccable and I highly respect her.
I am still extremely happy I got the book but what I realized was that; 1) I love figuring things out for myself ! There is a real excitement and satisfaction of saying Aha! That's how you do that! I enjoy the process of discovery. Like a child figuring out something on there own rather then having mommy or daddy do it for them. Not to say that some direction is useful but I try when I can to get it on my own. 2) I'm glad I didn't get this book sooner but I know I have a lot of practicing to do!- I am far from having technical effortlessness. I think I would consider that bead making nirvana. ommmmmnnn